I'm feeling lucky

I'm feeling lucky, even when things happen that could spell disaster....!
Report backs present numerous challenges, at times that's an understatement. Last week's presentations were no exception. The Community Room at Saxby's was reserved for Wednesday, July 29 at 1:00 and again for 7:00. Sunday August 2, I was scheduled to speak in the morning at the Bucks-Mont Unitarian Universalists Fellowship.
My brother and I met for an early lunch on Wednesday. We began getting together for lunch once a month shortly after our mother died two years ago. We've become friends, which is nice. We're only two years apart in age but were never friends. I'm enjoying him and look forward to our time together.
Mid way through lunch my cell phone rings....I debate answering but decide I should. It's Mary calling to say she'd called Saxby's checking about the availability of parking and they have no listing of my report backs on the schedule for today. OK! A call to Saxby' confirms....I'm no where to be found and someone has the room reserved between 6 and 8. They can "give" me 1:00 but not 7:00. Maybe the person at 6:00 will finish early? Maybe I can use the cafe area? Sorry, there's nothing they can do! I call Mary and say the show goes on, we just aren't sure where.
My brother wonders if I want to go over to Saxby"s. No! There's not much I can do about the situation so I'll just eat my lunch. We notice people arriving that have obviously been in the rain...it's pouring. Great, I have no umbrella. When we're ready to leave it's only sprinkling, so I'm feeling lucky.
I move chairs and tables in the Community Room, Bonnie arrives. She offers to help me with the set up. I plug in the projector and my laptop, we're ready to go. We chat and wait, wait some more and I realize Bonnie is my audience. She offers to come back in the evening but I refuse her offer. I could use the practice, it's no big deal And the show goes on. The best part about this? I really do not mind. I have Bonnie and that's fine with me. She likes the presentation. I'm feeling lucky!
Emma and I are presenting as a duo for the first time tonight. We hope to do this more often. She arrives at my house, I explain the mix-up and we head out for Saxby's. The man reserving the Community Room from 6-8 , believe it or not, is giving people mini-massages. I think he's selling some type equipment. It's really funny and he's not going anywhere before 8:00. The cafe is where we'll have to be. There are about eight people there for the report back and lots of people drinking coffee and using the Internet...little do they know, but they're about to learn about Gaza.
We move tables and chairs, take the pictures off the wall, adjust the projector and we're all set. Emma and I move through the presentation fairly smoothly. We complement each other; it's interesting having someone add a different perspective and style, plus, she's young! We notice customers are "attending" our presentation, our audience has expanded! There are questions and comments, we pass out my new list of resources and people begin leaving. One of the customers asks for a copy of the resource list. She tells me how much she learned, she'll be taking a course about the Middle East, now she knows about Gaza. She thanks me. I'm feeling lucky!
Sunday morning I'm off to the UUs. I've made major changes in the presentation because their schedule allows me about 20 minutes; I'm used to having up to an hour. It was extremely difficult deciding which pictures to remove, what information has to remain, how things would fit together....lots of choices and decisions.
The UU Fellowship is a nice place! The grounds are filled with flowers and plants flowing freely from one area to the next...a bit wild but under control.... beautiful and natural. The parking areas are lost among the flowers and shrubs. The building is pleasant but not very impressive. Inside, the the entry and reception room are large, serviceable and plain. Walk into the worship area....it's just wonderful space, simple, a large circular window in the front with 3 sculpted quilt panels around the bottom and part way up the sides of the circle. There are lots of windows on each side. Peaceful but very much alive! It's so comfortable for me being in this space feeling so peaceful and alive, it's energizing in a very special way, difficult to describe. I'm ready to share my story of Gaza, the things I saw, heard and experienced for myself. I'm feeling lucky!
The service begins. There are songs being sung....I'm so thankful they're not hymns...they're down to earth songs about peace, cooperation, respect, taking action, no more war. I raise my voice in song...being a part of this feels good. There are readings from Gandhi and Martin Luther King, Jr. Whether it was intentional or not I'm not sure, but everything speaks to the situation in Gaza.
Tom Thomas introduces me, he's taken the bio information from my blog, so I've written my own introduction. As I stand up and turn to face the fellowship, I find the room is full, really full, maybe 75 people, which is so exciting. I begin my Gaza story explaining about our delegation, the letter of invitation from UNRWA, our experience crossing into Gaza, point out locations on the map of Gaza. Then I begin with pictures of pretty Gaza on the beautiful Mediterranean. I could actually feel the audience relaxing, settling in, ready to enjoy the pictures. Then wham-o the destruction pictures begin. People are rapidly straightening up in their chairs, I hear sounds of shock and surprise and feel their tension. Judging from facial expressions, body language and the sounds I'm hearing, they're responding exactly as I'd hoped.
They are totally shocked by the destruction and how extensive it is. Many people tell me this after the presentation. The children's art therapy pictures from Qattan receive responses of sadness, wonder and concern. News of the plight of farmers and fishermen and the remote control gunning towers, bring looks of shock. The use of phosphorous bombs and Farah, a little 3 year old who's lost her mother to burns and is badly burned herself, causes strong reactions, including tears, a few people begin centering themselves for meditation.
Through out my story I've included pictures of hope, most involving children; hearts in the windows of a house drawn by one of the children at Qattan....even though there are bombs and missiles being shot from a helicopter; beautiful yellow flowers growing through cracks in the rubble; a young boy flying the kite he made (he'd even offered me a turn flying it); a home, totally destroyed, except for the grape arbor which is green and lush...there are even grapes growing; a tiny watermelon growing on a beautiful vine. There must be hope! These children deserve having a bright future and the opportunity to flourish and grow up in peace!
A lovely reception follows the service. I receive words of thanks, appreciation. I'm feeling lucky.i
It's mentioned my presentation isn't balanced. wouldn't it be better to include "the other side?" I explain the presentation's about what I saw, heard and experienced for myself in Gaza. I feel no need to "balance!" The main stream media; TV, newspapers, radio present "the other side" daily and with bias. Rarely is the Palestinian side presented, let alone positively. I receive a fairly positive shake of the head and an "I see."
Why doesn't Hamas just stop shooting those rockets? Hamas are all terrorists. If they stopped the rockets, Israel would leave them alone. I respond that I do not condone shooting rockets but point out when a country is invaded they have the right to defend themselves. A small percentage of Hamas members shoot rockets. They're far to the right...most political parties or groups have an extremes, Hamas is no different. I site the bombing of Oklahoma City, shooting doctors and staff from abortion clinics, etc. And, it's my belief that Israel deliberately provokes the shooting of rockets and then "responds with force" that's way out of proportion with the rockets.
Wasn't I afraid? No I wasn't!
Why is Israel doing this? What do they want? I wish I knew! I believe they want the Palestinians to disappear, which isn't going to happen. I'm beginning to think they are sick; caught up in violence and hatred that has spiraled out of control. But I wish I knew.
I receive praise, appreciation, thanks....wonderful support; all of that is needed by the presenter. Unfortunately, I often take criticism personally and self doubt takes over. I'm getting better with that but it still happens. Basically I'm insecure.
I'm told how brave and courageous I am, which isn't true and I wasn't afraid so there's no bravery of courage involved. I have interest, a desire to be involved, compassion, passion. Gaza has almost consumed me but I'm gaining balance. I'm comfortable telling my story hopeful people are listening and thinking.
I am lucky!